Kevin and I have been discussing the "after the wedding" scenario for weeks. Do we follow his career? Do we follow my career? Do we stay where we are and continue living in subsidized housing surrounded by cracked out mothers, baby daddies, and the random ferrel cat? The third option is not acceptable.
We were having dinner during one of the "Snowpocalyse" nights, and I brought it up. As I've been nearing graduation and the wedding, I've been a little more intense about the future. Before this semester, I was always firmly grounded in the present. I didn't need to focus on the future. The only thing beyond the day that I was concerned about was the wedding, and since my incredible mother was taking care of all the details, I wasn't even too concerned about that. Now, there's this big, dark pit called "future," and I've got to pull on my big girl pants and figure out what the hell I'm going to do with this.
So Kevin and I are eating at the kitchen table, and I get very serious all of a sudden.
"I've been job searching, and I haven't really found anything yet that's perfect for me, but all the jobs that I would want to do are in big cities like LA and New York."
Kevin put down his fork and looked up at me. We've had this conversation several times. All these past weeks, we've been unsure of what we're going to do. We were initially going to apply to the same places and see what matched up. However, he can't really apply for flight gigs until after or right before the wedding, and I can't apply for videography/writing/super awesome gigs until after the wedding. I've applied to a couple of places and have heard NOTHING, but when you put in your cover letter that you're not available until mid-July, I'm pretty sure that employers are not going "Oh, wow! She's going to be ready the same month that we are! This gives us so much time to paint her office and find the perfect plastic ficus!"
"You know," Kevin says, "I want you to job hunt like I don't exist."
"You want me to what?"
"I want you to apply for jobs that you think will get you to the place that you want to be. Pretend like my career doesn't factor in. Go for what you want, and don't take me into account."
Kevin is allowing me to pursue my dreams regardless of his.
"Honey, I can get a job anywhere. I'm a pilot, and I could commute to the hub. If we live in a different city, it's not a huge deal."
Kevin is putting my hopes before his.
Kevin is making sure that the world is my oyster.
Kevin is a real person, and I am totally not making him up.
(And he is mine, and no, I will not share.)
Kevin is a stud. He is awesome. I love him (and you of course) SUPER MUCH!
ReplyDeletePS...Please don't move too far from me. I already don't see you enough.
I too am on the job hunt, trying to figure out how to be a "real person." What I've found out so far is that this ideal job I had in my head doesn't really exist. I found that after I was willing to make a few compromises, I was surprised at how many doors opened up for me. I bet it's the same for you.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck in your job-hunting!